anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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