i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
