You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
