you suck at this game today
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics