We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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