butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
