So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
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