Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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