I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
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