Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize