why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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