Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
