Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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