when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
