rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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