I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
