You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
