She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
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