How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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