Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
