she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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