im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Randomize
