its not stalking. its research.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
