I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
