I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
NoShamevember. You game?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
