There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
meet me or not, i'm out of control
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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