god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
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I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
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He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
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