You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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