Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
