yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
