Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
