Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
