hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
