So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake π
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize