dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
