Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
