Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize
