Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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