meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize