You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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