Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
