Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
