I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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