Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
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i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
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The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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