you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
