put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
