Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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