Define "chronic" masturbator.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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