He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
