i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
