ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
