You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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